FUN: Views of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

FUN: Views of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

Post by Spike.. » Wed, 21 Jul 2004 10:01:01



GEORGE W BUSH?- We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
The chicken is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground
here.
COLIN POWELL?- Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
HANS BLIX -?We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have
not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. JOHN
KERRY -?Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now
against it!
HOWARD DEAN - That chicken is there because George Bush lied to put him
in harm's way to cross that road.
RALPH NADER - The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had
been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach
the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
PAT BUCHANAN -?To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
RUSH LIMBAUGH?- I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but
I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll
bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help
chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much
more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid
for by their tax dollars.?And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking
about your money, money the government took from you to build a road for
chickens to cross.
MARTHA STEWART?-?No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
insider information.
DR SEUSS?-?Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a
toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not
been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY?-?To die in the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR?- I envision a world where all chickens will be
free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA?-?In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
BARBARA WALTERS -?Isn't that interesting??In a few moments, we will
be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to
accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.
JOHN LENNON?- Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
together - in peace.
ARISTOTLE?-?It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX?- It was an historic inevitability. RONALD REAGAN?-?What
chicken?
CAPTAIN KIRK?-?To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
SIGMUND FREUD?-?The fact that you are at all concerned that the
chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying *** insecurity.
BILL GATES?-?I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
balance your checkbook, - and internet explorer is an integral part of
eChicken.
ALBERT EINSTEIN?-?Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON?-?I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is
your definition of chicken?
AL GORE?- I invented the chicken!
THE BIBLE?-?And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the
chicken THOU SHALT CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road,
and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS?-?Did I miss one?

OKC dave    85 for 04

 
 
 

FUN: Views of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

Post by M-C » Wed, 21 Jul 2004 10:46:32


Oh my gosh, what a good laugh that was... Dr Seuss was my favorite!
--
M-C in Petite Pierre du Nord (AR)
http://www.FoundCollection.com/


GEORGE W BUSH - We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
The chicken is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground
here.
COLIN POWELL - Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
HANS BLIX - We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have
not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. JOHN
KERRY - Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now
against it!
HOWARD DEAN - That chicken is there because George Bush lied to put him
in harm's way to cross that road.
RALPH NADER - The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had
been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach
the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
PAT BUCHANAN - To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
RUSH LIMBAUGH - I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but
I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll
bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help
chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much
more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid
for by their tax dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking
about your money, money the government took from you to build a road for
chickens to cross.
MARTHA STEWART - No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
insider information.
DR SEUSS - Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a
toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not
been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY - To die in the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR - I envision a world where all chickens will be
free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA - In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
BARBARA WALTERS - Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will
be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to
accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.
JOHN LENNON - Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
together - in peace.
ARISTOTLE - It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX - It was an historic inevitability. RONALD REAGAN - What
chicken?
CAPTAIN KIRK - To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
SIGMUND FREUD - The fact that you are at all concerned that the
chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying *** insecurity.
BILL GATES - I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only
cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
balance your checkbook, - and internet explorer is an integral part of
eChicken.
ALBERT EINSTEIN - Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON - I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is
your definition of chicken?
AL***- I invented the chicken!
THE BIBLE - And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the
chicken THOU SHALT CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road,
and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS - Did I miss one?

OKC dave    85 for 04

 
 
 

FUN: Views of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

Post by Marcia Tomse » Thu, 22 Jul 2004 01:40:36


This was hilarious!!  My personal favorite: COLONEL SANDERS - Did I miss one?

I have a streak of dark humor that runs through me. :-)

Quote:

> Oh my gosh, what a good laugh that was... Dr Seuss was my favorite!
> --
> M-C in Petite Pierre du Nord (AR)
> http://www.FoundCollection.com/



> GEORGE W BUSH - We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
> We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
> The chicken is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground
> here.
> COLIN POWELL - Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
> satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
> HANS BLIX - We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have
> not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. JOHN
> KERRY - Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now
> against it!
> HOWARD DEAN - That chicken is there because George Bush lied to put him
> in harm's way to cross that road.
> RALPH NADER - The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had
> been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach
> the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
> crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
> PAT BUCHANAN - To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
> RUSH LIMBAUGH - I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but
> I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll
> bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help
> chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much
> more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid
> for by their tax dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking
> about your money, money the government took from you to build a road for
> chickens to cross.
> MARTHA STEWART - No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
> was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
> when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
> insider information.
> DR SEUSS - Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a
> toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not
> been told.
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY - To die in the rain. Alone.
> MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR - I envision a world where all chickens will be
> free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
> GRANDPA - In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
> Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
> BARBARA WALTERS - Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will
> be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
> story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to
> accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.
> JOHN LENNON - Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
> together - in peace.
> ARISTOTLE - It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
> KARL MARX - It was an historic inevitability. RONALD REAGAN - What
> chicken?
> CAPTAIN KIRK - To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
> SIGMUND FREUD - The fact that you are at all concerned that the
> chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying *** insecurity.
> BILL GATES - I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only
> cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
> balance your checkbook, - and internet explorer is an integral part of
> eChicken.
> ALBERT EINSTEIN - Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
> road move beneath the chicken?
> BILL CLINTON - I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is
> your definition of chicken?
> AL***- I invented the chicken!
> THE BIBLE - And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the
> chicken THOU SHALT CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road,
> and there was much rejoicing.
> COLONEL SANDERS - Did I miss one?

> OKC dave    85 for 04

 
 
 

FUN: Views of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

Post by suthrngir » Thu, 22 Jul 2004 08:30:14


Too funny.  I liked the Nader one.  LMAO

Cheers!
Elaine
http://www.FoundCollection.com/

"In the long run we shape our lives and we shape ourselves. The process
never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own
responsibility."

Quote:

> GEORGE W BUSH - We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
> We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
> The chicken is either against us or for us. There is no middle ground
> here.
> COLIN POWELL - Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
> satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.
> HANS BLIX - We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have
> not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. JOHN
> KERRY - Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I am now
> against it!
> HOWARD DEAN - That chicken is there because George Bush lied to put him
> in harm's way to cross that road.
> RALPH NADER - The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had
> been polluted by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach
> the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
> crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
> PAT BUCHANAN - To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
> RUSH LIMBAUGH - I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but
> I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll
> bet that somebody out there is already forming a support group to help
> chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much
> more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid
> for by their tax dollars. And when I say tax dollars, I'm talking
> about your money, money the government took from you to build a road for
> chickens to cross.
> MARTHA STEWART - No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
> was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs
> when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
> insider information.
> DR SEUSS - Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a
> toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not
> been told.
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY - To die in the rain. Alone.
> MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR - I envision a world where all chickens will be
> free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
> GRANDPA - In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
> Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
> BARBARA WALTERS - Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will
> be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
> story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to
> accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.
> JOHN LENNON - Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
> together - in peace.
> ARISTOTLE - It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
> KARL MARX - It was an historic inevitability. RONALD REAGAN - What
> chicken?
> CAPTAIN KIRK - To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
> SIGMUND FREUD - The fact that you are at all concerned that the
> chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying *** insecurity.
> BILL GATES - I have just witnessed eChicken2003, which will not only
> cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
> balance your checkbook, - and internet explorer is an integral part of
> eChicken.
> ALBERT EINSTEIN - Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
> road move beneath the chicken?
> BILL CLINTON - I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is
> your definition of chicken?
> AL***- I invented the chicken!
> THE BIBLE - And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the
> chicken THOU SHALT CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road,
> and there was much rejoicing.
> COLONEL SANDERS - Did I miss one?

> OKC dave    85 for 04

 
 
 

FUN: Views of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road

Post by Sabri » Thu, 22 Jul 2004 21:19:54


ROTFL!!Dave,You made my day!

Hugs,
Sabrina in Kentucky

 The more you know,the more you know that you don't know much....