Of monks & doors & kids

Of monks & doors & kids

Post by DABla » Sat, 19 Sep 1998 04:00:00

Deb Keller's parable about the monks was a good one.  It reminds me a bit of
another useful image I once heard.  I think this story was supposed to have
been involving Native Americans, but not sure.

A family with a small child was about to enter a building with a door.  The
child began to open it, but was having a hard time figuring out just how to do
it.  The family fell back and waited silently for the child to open the door,
though it took some time and struggle on the part of the child.  When the door
was opened, they all went though. . .

This image helped me numerous times, especially when my kid was little.   It
forced me to see the value of waiting patiently *longer than I might have* for
the time it took him to figure something out on his own, or have at least some
success with his struggle.  I was already used to taking this approach with
him, but this story gave me an *image* I could call up in my mind's eye --a way
to physically "honor" an important process happening. . . .  we can use this on
ourselves too  :-)

Diane B.


Of monks & doors & kids

Post by Barbara Foste » Sat, 19 Sep 1998 04:00:00

Very beautiful story, Diane, and very true!  When my kids were little, I
heard the usual "Let me do it!" (still hear it, in fact!).  No matter HOW
much I wanted to "help" them, and it was hard not to, I had to let them
try.  Very often they surprised both themselves and me, and we both wound
up learning something about ourselves.  Kids grow up so quickly, and a
parents job is to provide a "launch ramp", NOT to do it all for them.