a Warning(kinda long!)

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by kk » Fri, 17 Jul 1998 04:00:00



Quote:

>  Guys- I'm sorry I didn't post sooner, but our server hasn't been working the
> past couple of days. I hope what happened to Sherry isn't going to keep
> people from posting.The circumstances, as Sherry described them, seemed
> isolated to her own particular situation and not fitting to others of the
> group.

Frankly, I found it very fitting.  We need to watch ourselves.  The "accidental"
posts, as well as supposedly subtle snide post (I no longer have it in queue, so
please don't ask) made it clear, to me at least, that Sherry's experience needed
to be heard so we learn to moderate our own messages.  Sad, but true.

Furthermore, as far as I can see, Sherry's SERVER was the university; that
doesn't mean she was only messaging on company time.  In fact, she has for years
warned those who use .ed based servers to mind their p's and q's about just that
sort of thing lest the privilege be yanked for any but students and faculty.
It's just as well that she switched...although I can't say I'm impressed with
AOL! <evil grin>

Kelly
<who hopes THIS will be the end of it>

 
 
 

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by ShryBail » Sat, 18 Jul 1998 04:00:00


The person was definitely NOT an employee, that much I was told by my boss. (If
I insisted, I think he would tell me who it was -- think I should do that?)

The real problem was that some interfering person with personal animosity
toward me bothered the administration of my university, including if not
directly to the university President. This embarrassed my boss and in the kind
of bureaucracy it is, that is the ultimate offense. They seemed perfectly happy
with my (honest) explanation, and apology for participating in the thread
joking about a previous president. Nobody has cited, nor have I ever seen, any
written policy that I violated, and using the University Internet connection is
a perquisite of employment. I stopped only to prove a point, not because I had
to.

My warning is about sabotage, betrayal by someone who can grossly overreact
about what is ultimately trivia (comments in a newsgroup and/or e-mail) to the
extent that they no longer care what impact their actions have on people's
lives. THAT could happen to anyone with the misfortune to trigger some sick
person's personal buttons. I think the warning is valid.

Sherry

 
 
 

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by RoSchwar » Sat, 18 Jul 1998 04:00:00


Although I consistently read (and enjoy, and appreciate) this newsgroup (and
have done so for years) I haven't posted for a very long time. No special
reason; I guess I just haven't felt that I had anything to say.
Now I do.

This comment:
"Sherry, as you have stated yourself, your communication can be considered rude
and abrasive at times..."
has taken me out of lurking mode.
Couldn't the person who posted this have offered her suggestions without that
"reminder?"

For as long as I've been signing on to this newsgroup, I've read comments about
Sherry's posts. I felt that most have been uncalled for and more abrasive than
any comments she had made.

I don't know Sherry personally, and I'm sure she doesn't need me to put up a
defense, but I guess I just feel that enough is enough.

I may be thicker skinned than most, but I have never found Sherry's posts to be
that rude, obtrusive, abrasive, disparaging, insulting, or any of the other
negative adjectives used to describe them. She is sometimes terse or blunt or
occasionally a little critical; many of us are.
I know that I have been consistently impressed by the way she (and others- esp.
Dotty McMillan) have graciously answered every posters' questions, (even when
they are the same questions over, and over, and over again.) She's not a
martyr; she has chosen to do this- and many people have benefitted from it.
From where I sit, Sherry has been one of this newsgroup's staunchest advocators
and dedicated contributors to it's success.

I understand that sometimes some of you may be upset by someone else's words.
When hundreds of people get together, how can there not be disagreements and
occasional lapses of good judgement? Sherry is not the only one guilty of these
things. I've found it distressing to see how often she has been made to feel
that she had to apologize for saying things, or simply for being herself. And
I'm amazed at how often she has done so; a truly arrogant woman would not.

We're all different. Some shout while others whisper. Some cry, some moan, some
pout, some sulk. Some of us talk (write) more gently, or more "kindly" than
others. Some of us are able to "couch" our criticisms; some of us can't, or
just don't. Would that we could all, always, say (write, or do) just the right
thing in just the right way.
If there can't always be a happy medium, when it comes to extremes I, for one,
would prefer dealing with the person who faces me with both barrels loaded than
with the one who holds a knife to my back.

Perhaps everyone can try to make a special effort not to take any comments too
seriously or personally? And of course, do remember that this is a public
podium. Don't say anything here that you wouldn't want to see in tomorrows
newspaper headlines.

I truly hope noone takes this as a criticism. I may be out of order, but I felt
it had to be said. This is a wonderful board and I do appreciate all of your
contributions in making it so.
Roberta

 
 
 

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by kk » Sat, 18 Jul 1998 04:00:00


Quote:
>  And of course, do remember that this is a public
> podium. Don't say anything here that you wouldn't want to see in tomorrows
> newspaper headlines.

Mom, is that you??  <g>

Precisely my credo, and about the only thing my mother taught me that I actually
paid attention t...!  Of course, there are only a few things in my life I wouldn't
want to see there, and this ain't on the list....!

Quote:
> I truly hope noone takes this as a criticism. I may be out of order, but I felt
> it had to be said. This is a wonderful board and I do appreciate all of your
> contributions in making it so.
> Roberta

Right on, Roberta!

--
The Polymer Clay Color Chip Chart 3rd Edition is HERE!
http://www.jewlart.com/chart/

 
 
 

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by Narigo » Sat, 18 Jul 1998 04:00:00



Quote:

>"Sherry, as you have stated yourself, your communication can be considered
>rude and abrasive at times..."

Actually, I've found Sherry to be one of the most helpful people on this
newsgroup. She consistantly gives long and well-thought-out answers to
questions that have been answered a million times and doesn't seem to mind
doing it. I'm starting to be appalled at the number of people who have taken
the opportunity while she's in a crisis to tell her how "rude and abrasive"
they think she is. I'm thinking it's pretty rude and abrasive to do so.

In fact, she does speak her mind. In fact, there are people who use newsgroups
and mail lists as their own personal therapy sessions and several times I've
been glad to see a reminder that this newsgroup is for polyclay. Off-topic
posts haven't been a problem here. There are some and they're enjoyable because
the whole thing hasn't degenerated into an anything-goes free-for-all.  

Throwing slings and arrows in the guise of support is probably not what is
needed in this situation.

Carol

 
 
 

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by kk » Sat, 18 Jul 1998 04:00:00


So now we have two MORE posts from the same two people which should have gone
private and which are worded so as to get maximum punch for the buck.

I can't speak for the rest of the group, but frankly, it reflects on the
pot-stirrers more than it does on Sherry, so can't we PLEASE try to behave like
***s and get back to the topic at hand, which is ***POLYMER CLAY***???     If
you want to persist, go
form an alt.clayslinging.fight.fight.fight group and leave the rest of us out of
it.  We don't want to hear about it.   Ok?

Kelly
<hoping she speaks for most of the group>

 
 
 

a Warning(kinda long!)

Post by kk » Mon, 20 Jul 1998 04:00:00


This should have been a private e-mail.  I can't believe that posts like this
<mercifully clipped> are only posted to continue the mudslinging.  It's to Sherry's
benefit that she hasn't responded in kind.

I have seen no posts maligning your children, and don't wish to.  I *have* seen
deliberate pot-stirrings referring to them, and trust me, it's a very juvenile
tactic, one that insults the intelligence of ALL of us, just as "oopsie, this
should have gone private" does.
I'm asking nicely that you please desist these posts, and I'm asking publicly so
others know you HAVE been asked.

And if you had even a *small* clue about me, you'd know NObody "has me attacking"
anyone.  I make my own choices, and from where I sit, Sherry has been exemplary in
what she's NOT responded to.

Can we PLEASE drop it????

Quote:

>   Kelly- Please don't twist my words or intentions. My apology and
> explanation to Carol stands- If you aren't interested in this thread, why
> have you posted to it 5 times? Since we don't know each other, and I have
> never been rude to you like this, I can only surmise that you think I
> reported those things about Sherry to her boss.